Nicole Thomte, LMFT
Affirming therapist for queer and kinky communities
- LGBTQIA+ affirmative
- Sex-positive care
- Trauma-aware practice
About Nicole Thomte
Nicole Thomte (she/her or they/them) is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) practicing from Minnesota with 13 years of clinical experience. Nicole centers work with people, couples, and families who live outside mainstream expectations, offering affirmative and sex-positive care for LGBTQIA+ individuals, people involved in kink and BDSM, consensual non-monogamy and polyamorous relationships, and other alternative relationship structures. She brings an intersectional feminist perspective and a strong commitment to advocacy for marginalized communities, aiming to create a space where clients can pursue change on their own terms.
Nicole’s approach blends solution-focused work with client-centered listening, and she draws on skills from cognitive and behavioral frameworks and dialectical techniques when helpful. Her style is exploratory and non-directive, emphasizing the client as the expert on their life while offering observations that can reveal patterns and new options. Nicole values humor as a resource during stressful times and recognizes the validity of asexuality alongside sex-positive therapy and sex therapy interests.
Her clinical background includes early work as a state intern beginning in 2013 in behavioral health settings that served people with complex needs, along with years of group supervision and co-facilitation of survivor groups with Gender Justice Nevada from 2012 through 2018. Nicole describes her career change into therapy as a long, thoughtful decision and a profoundly meaningful vocation. She is known as a driven advocate who focuses on trauma and abuse, relationship and intimacy issues, stress and anxiety, mood disorders including depression and bipolar, grief, ADHD, chronic pain and illness, family dynamics, and multicultural and gender-diverse concerns. MN LMFT 3853.
Nicole’s approach blends solution-focused work with client-centered listening, and she draws on skills from cognitive and behavioral frameworks and dialectical techniques when helpful. Her style is exploratory and non-directive, emphasizing the client as the expert on their life while offering observations that can reveal patterns and new options. Nicole values humor as a resource during stressful times and recognizes the validity of asexuality alongside sex-positive therapy and sex therapy interests.
Her clinical background includes early work as a state intern beginning in 2013 in behavioral health settings that served people with complex needs, along with years of group supervision and co-facilitation of survivor groups with Gender Justice Nevada from 2012 through 2018. Nicole describes her career change into therapy as a long, thoughtful decision and a profoundly meaningful vocation. She is known as a driven advocate who focuses on trauma and abuse, relationship and intimacy issues, stress and anxiety, mood disorders including depression and bipolar, grief, ADHD, chronic pain and illness, family dynamics, and multicultural and gender-diverse concerns. MN LMFT 3853.
Areas of Expertise
Primary Focus
Also Specializes In
Family conflictsTrauma and abuseGriefAnger managementCareer difficultiesBipolar disorderDepressionCoping with life changesCompassion fatigueADHD
Additional Focus Areas
BDSM, kink, and alternative sex cultureChronic pain, illness, and disabilityCommunication problemsGender dysphoriaMood disordersMulticultural concernsPanic disorder and panic attacksPhobiasPolyamory / non-monogamous relationshipsPrejudice and discriminationSexualityWomen's issues
Therapeutic Approach
Client-Centered Therapy Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Motivational Interviewing Solution-Focused Therapy Trauma-Focused Therapy
Frequently Asked Questions
How much experience does Nicole Thomte have?
Nicole Thomte has 13 years of clinical experience.
Is Nicole Thomte a licensed therapist?
Yes. She holds the credential LMFT, which stands for Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and practices under license MN LMFT 3853.
In which languages does Nicole Thomte provide therapy?
Nicole provides therapy in English.
Where is Nicole Thomte located?
Nicole is located in Minnesota.
How can I work with Nicole Thomte as my therapist?
You can work with Nicole through video calls, phone sessions, live chat, or text-based messaging.
Does Nicole Thomte work with international clients?
No. Nicole does not currently work with international clients.
How much does therapy with Nicole Thomte cost?
Costs can vary depending on factors like location and therapist availability. Sessions are billed through a subscription that can be canceled at any time, for any reason. For current pricing and details, please click the "Start Therapy" button on this page.
How can I get started with therapy?
Getting started is straightforward. Click the "Start Therapy" button and complete a short questionnaire that helps match you with a therapist. Depending on availability, you can then schedule your first session, which may take place by phone, video call, live chat, or in-app messaging.
Therapeutic Approaches and Online Care
Nicole often combines client-centered therapy with solution-focused strategies and cognitive behavioral techniques. Client-centered therapy emphasizes listening, empathy, and collaboration so clients can explore their own goals and values while feeling seen and understood. Solution-focused work concentrates on strengths and practical steps to move toward preferred changes, which can be especially useful for relationship, communication, and coping concerns. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps identify patterns of thinking and behavior that contribute to stress, anxiety, or mood challenges and offers tools to shift those patterns and improve daily functioning.Finding the right approach is part of the therapeutic process, and Nicole works collaboratively with each person to determine which methods best fit their needs, goals, and preferences. She tailors strategies to the individual or couple rather than applying a one-size-fits-all model, inviting clients to shape the direction of care.
Online therapy with Nicole is available via video calls, phone sessions, live chat, or text-based messaging, offering flexibility for people balancing work, family, medical needs, or geographic constraints. These options make it easier to maintain consistent sessions, access care from home, and choose the format that feels most comfortable for addressing stress, relationship concerns, trauma-related issues, and identity-affirming work.